I knew I loved my wife from the second time I saw her. I met her through a mutual friend of ours and at the time she was involved in a relationship, and I was no where close to being ready for anything serious. We hung out a few times as a large group of friends going to movies, bowling, ect. It did not take long for us both to realize that we had just about everything in common (even carrying on entire conversations with nothing but movie quotes)
We quickly became best friends. We hung out with each other almost everyday, at least five days a week. This went on for six months or so. All the while I knew that I was madly in love with her, but willing to keep that to my self for sake of the best friendship I had ever known.
It wasn’t long till she and her boyfriend broke things off and went their separate ways. I was still in love with her, but again didn’t want to risk loosing her if things didn’t work out. She was vulnerable and hurt (as she should have been just getting out of a relationship.), and I just wanted to be there for her and comfort her. At this point we both thought she would be moving back to Chicago.
I took her to my brother’s house warming party. Where at 19 and 130 lbs she walked through the door and told my brother (who was a combat engineer in the 82nd airborn for eight years), and all of his friends that she was going to drink all you bitches under the table… .. .
Now it has been over seven years but she had seven screw drivers, a margarita, a beer, and two shots of Jameson(my drink of choice) all in about a hour and a half. She got pretty f’ed up pretty quick. I decided to take her out on the back porch so she could get some air and have some water. We sat in the dark on a clear star covered night. We started talking about relationships and what not. I did not expect what happened next…
A priceless moment is when the person that you have fallen in love with, looks you right in the eyes and then as I was expecting her to tell me how she felt about me, she projectile vomited across the table onto my face….Yeah, she puked on me. Then she started crying and puked on her self. A drunk college aged stranger on the back porch cried out “FUCK DUDE, SHE JUST PUKED ON YOU”, thanks douche bag, I think I got that.
I did my best to clean my self and escorted her to the bathroom where she puked and passed out for the next hour or so. Then I took her home, where she took a bath and we passed out on my futon watching Montey Python's Holy Grail. So much for a romantic conversation. It all worked out in the end…I think My ladies just like making me get bodily waste in my mouth…For those who don't understand that comment read Got A Dirty Mouth
And I still married her…